Care & feeding

So part of the stress for me (and I assume Brent as well) is that we are not taking Evan with us. We are so fortunate to have both sets of grandparents taking care of Evan in our absense, but I am still worried :) So Brent has written "Care & Feeding of Evan" in a wonderfuly "snarky tone," here are a few excerpts:

Wake-Up / Bedtime

His Majesty normally rises at 6:30 – which may be delayed to as last as 7:15 without repercussion. Later than that, and you risk naptime/bedtime/attitude problems. Naptime is after lunch, normally about 1:00, but lately he's taken to fuss about naps and your experience may vary. Best case scenario, he sleeps from 1-3 in the afternoon. He may sleep as little as 45 minutes or not at all. Getting him to take a nap will make your lives easier, trust me (it will make him go to bed earlier, believe it or not).

Also see toothbrushing and bathtime.

Bedtime typically starts at 8:00 or a few minutes after. If bedtime starts after 9:00 – you are asking for trouble. It may take as long as an hour to get him asleep, and when His Majesty is feeling particularly devilish – it may be 11:00 before he's actually closed his eyes. In these cases, we leave him in the bedroom with a careful ear to chase him back into bed if he gets up. A stuffed animal frequently helps out when he's crying about being put to bed.

At the beginning, a few books will help him shift into a lower gear.

It's not unusual for him to wake up a time or two in the middle of the night crying... 15 seconds of back rubbing along with some calming words normally fix things.

Sickness

In the event that he get's throwing up sick (1) man oh man, are we sorry and (2) Pedialite, or other electrolite solution, will be your main tool. Keep him as hydrated as possible. Don't get pedialite that has a color (purple or orange) unless you like your carpet to have a kind of tie-dye look when he vomits on it. Obviously, it will be doctor time at that point. May the Force be with you.

Clothes and Pajamas

He wears them. He hates to wear shoes, be prepared for him to take them off at any time

Coercion

The things that he wants to see/play with the most are: playing outside, trains, cars, Wall-e, Elmo, and if you need to go the nuclear route you can use the “N” word (Nemo). You can normally coax him into doing anything with some of the above options. If you plan to go outside, be prepared to tolerate some pouting and whining when it's time to go in.

Automobiles

Just like His Magesty's Mother, King Evan will normally fall asleep within 15 minutes of starting any trip. He's also been known to not sleep at all (10 hours on the way to Louisville, not 1 minute of nap) or on the other extreme, he'll fall asleep before you are out of the parking lot of the playground (if tuckered out).

In any event, he's pretty good about riding in a carseat. Sometimes he wants to slip off the sholder harness, but some simple correcting will normally get him to put his safety gear back on. He may put up a fuss, but we normally pass him a toy from the diaper bag to distract him. If these don't work, you may try earplugs (for you, not him).

**Flip the child safety lock located near the door latch... this is accessible only when the door is open and keeps the door from being opened from the inside. The latch normally looks like a mini-light switch. Failure to do this will likely result in you having a heart attack caused by His Magesty opening the door at 80 miles an hour while you are on the freeway... ask us how we know.**